Listen up, peeps!
I got extra lazy this past year in not getting some of my holiday stuff taken care of, so I thought it might be a good idea to be even more lazy and send out a general holiday greeting to everyone. This means that no matter what branch of the tree of life that you want to be on, I wish you a happy, healthy, safe, and memorable holiday, with good food, good friends and good conversations!
I hope that the coming year will be an excellent one, but one easily forgotten--the sad thing is, the less we remember a year, the chances are it was one in which disasters never happened! Let's achieve our overall goals, and hope that the vicious and wicked sleep on beds of thorns and needles, and the impoverished sleep on beds of flowers.
Let us look with kindness to those worse off than ourselves, and do one good thing every day, just to keep in practice! If we can't say something nice about someone, we should either keep silent, or make sure we have proof before we say anything! (heh, heh)
Treat animals and children with care and love, never forget that we aren't alone in the multi-verse, and that home cooked food is better than TV dinners!
That's my speech for the holidays, and now I shall simply go and be on my merry way until....whatever time comes that I have something further to say.
May all your dreams come true.
Mary
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
My mom
is 82, and counting now, and something slightly disturbing happened last night.
Mom is nearly blind, is unable to care for herself, doesn't watch TV. Essentially, she is isolated in a small, growing smaller, world.
She used to be on top of debates and news, and used to read newspapers and was well aware of the world at large, at once capable of arguing local news stories and larger stories with most anyone. She has always been a bit of a woman's libber, and an inspiration to me as I was growing up. It's always been a part of me to be a strong Boston liberal because of her.
Last night, I found out that she didn't know who the president was.
How do you explain to someone all the events of the last 2+ years in a few minutes over the phone? You can't.
I told her about Obama as much as I could. I mentioned Joe Biden as VP, and I tried to explain about John McCain, and him she knew about. I mentioned Sarah Palin in as brief a fashion as I could. But two, three years? I will just have to wing it.
Does anyone else have to deal with someone so isolated? It's a difficult world out there, and we need to find ways to cope with the daily dealings, trying to keep from falling into the abyss. And knowing that some people are ignorant, not because they want to be, but because that's just how it is for them, is just a fact that we can't change.
It doesn't mean a whole lot in the real world. These people are not among the likely population that vote, debate or participate in the democratic sphere. They have limitations that makes life in general more difficult. They are among the voters who are often touted as the "non-voters" on election day--the ones who are assumed to not give a crap and just won't "show up" for voting. No one takes into account that they can't show up--they aren't capable of showing up.
We would all like to see everyone vote and take part in the process. But if we realize that some people just can't, we won't rely on their vote--if they do, it's a bonus.
Just think of all the people who are in situations where they can no longer perform their civic duty. We can't force them to vote. And even if we "help" them vote, what good is a vote when there is no thinking involved in it? We've seen people vote for something on a strictly visceral level--we are reminded of all the voters who went for Bush in 2000 because he was "just like" them--the one that they felt they could "share a drink" with them and be a "regular" guy. Telling people how they should vote is not a good way to earn a democratic win--it's a cheat. And yeah, it happens. And we've seen how it works in action, and it's unfair--completely unfair. But I'd rather see a loss honestly than a win undeserved.
My mom should now know who Barack Obama is. While she forgets things easily, I mentioned his name often enough to perhaps stick with her. When I vote, I keep her in mind when I decide who I want to represent the both of us. Even if she isn't voting, I am, and while my vote isn't two votes, I do try to make it count for more than myself.
Mom is nearly blind, is unable to care for herself, doesn't watch TV. Essentially, she is isolated in a small, growing smaller, world.
She used to be on top of debates and news, and used to read newspapers and was well aware of the world at large, at once capable of arguing local news stories and larger stories with most anyone. She has always been a bit of a woman's libber, and an inspiration to me as I was growing up. It's always been a part of me to be a strong Boston liberal because of her.
Last night, I found out that she didn't know who the president was.
How do you explain to someone all the events of the last 2+ years in a few minutes over the phone? You can't.
I told her about Obama as much as I could. I mentioned Joe Biden as VP, and I tried to explain about John McCain, and him she knew about. I mentioned Sarah Palin in as brief a fashion as I could. But two, three years? I will just have to wing it.
Does anyone else have to deal with someone so isolated? It's a difficult world out there, and we need to find ways to cope with the daily dealings, trying to keep from falling into the abyss. And knowing that some people are ignorant, not because they want to be, but because that's just how it is for them, is just a fact that we can't change.
It doesn't mean a whole lot in the real world. These people are not among the likely population that vote, debate or participate in the democratic sphere. They have limitations that makes life in general more difficult. They are among the voters who are often touted as the "non-voters" on election day--the ones who are assumed to not give a crap and just won't "show up" for voting. No one takes into account that they can't show up--they aren't capable of showing up.
We would all like to see everyone vote and take part in the process. But if we realize that some people just can't, we won't rely on their vote--if they do, it's a bonus.
Just think of all the people who are in situations where they can no longer perform their civic duty. We can't force them to vote. And even if we "help" them vote, what good is a vote when there is no thinking involved in it? We've seen people vote for something on a strictly visceral level--we are reminded of all the voters who went for Bush in 2000 because he was "just like" them--the one that they felt they could "share a drink" with them and be a "regular" guy. Telling people how they should vote is not a good way to earn a democratic win--it's a cheat. And yeah, it happens. And we've seen how it works in action, and it's unfair--completely unfair. But I'd rather see a loss honestly than a win undeserved.
My mom should now know who Barack Obama is. While she forgets things easily, I mentioned his name often enough to perhaps stick with her. When I vote, I keep her in mind when I decide who I want to represent the both of us. Even if she isn't voting, I am, and while my vote isn't two votes, I do try to make it count for more than myself.
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Alcoholism
A question: why are so many alcoholics so goddamned selfish? It's always about "me, me, me," and no one else. They act like martyrs when they're the ones who are acting like assholes, and if you don't immediately give in to their demands, too fucking bad...for you.
And even when you discount all of that emotional baggage, they track on a different one--the one where they act out like children because they never learned how to grow up and take on responsibility. Their level of maturity is about equal to the proof of their favorite libation.
I have reached the end of my tolerance level when it comes to these crybabies. And I wish I knew how to change things to make everything better, but that's just my inner child trying to smack me upside the head and know that, for the most part, the only solution is to get rid of them from your life. Wish I could.
And even when you discount all of that emotional baggage, they track on a different one--the one where they act out like children because they never learned how to grow up and take on responsibility. Their level of maturity is about equal to the proof of their favorite libation.
I have reached the end of my tolerance level when it comes to these crybabies. And I wish I knew how to change things to make everything better, but that's just my inner child trying to smack me upside the head and know that, for the most part, the only solution is to get rid of them from your life. Wish I could.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
A 12 hour period spent in hell (Or, Why I Feel Like Crap After a Sleep Study)
Ugh. I'm lucky I'm here today, as Tuesday night, I spent about 12 hours in hell, part of a "sleep study." It's definitely not something I'd be happy about doing again. According to the tech, I "met the criteria" for using a CPAP machine, but I don't think the test is an objective tool at all--not with all the crappy wires, leads, straps or anything else they put on you, or even as they try to make the atmosphere more acceptable, it's not very inviting. I ended up sleeping on my back which was quite uncomfortable, and that alone is a result of the extra 20 lbs they pile on you with equipment. Tell me how you're supposed to turn on your side with all that stuff?
As it's already 4 am, and as I am still awake and working online (though I am finally getting a bit more drowsy), it's difficult for me to think that falling asleep around 11:30 at night is natural to me. I night have an episode or two of early sleep, but 95% of the time, I don't sleep that early at all. It's only when people challenge the status quo that we have a more rounded world--when I worked many moons ago as a nurse's aide, I worked graveyard shift, and staying up all night was my usual routine. Some people are just born with the propensity to tolerate different sleep patterns.
In the mean time, I will continue to protest the tests and the unfunny and claustrophobic face mask until I get some greater idea of why I should tolerate it all longer.
As it's already 4 am, and as I am still awake and working online (though I am finally getting a bit more drowsy), it's difficult for me to think that falling asleep around 11:30 at night is natural to me. I night have an episode or two of early sleep, but 95% of the time, I don't sleep that early at all. It's only when people challenge the status quo that we have a more rounded world--when I worked many moons ago as a nurse's aide, I worked graveyard shift, and staying up all night was my usual routine. Some people are just born with the propensity to tolerate different sleep patterns.
In the mean time, I will continue to protest the tests and the unfunny and claustrophobic face mask until I get some greater idea of why I should tolerate it all longer.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Remember Pearl Harbor
December 7, 1941: Even now, as the hours pass here on the East coast, we find our thoughts turning to a group of islands in the Pacific, even before the Hawaiian Islands became our 50th state. We all know what happened on that day, when at the crack of dawn, Japanese fighter pilots invaded the peace and quiet of paradise, and entered us into the Pacific Theatre of World War II.
Things have changed since then, of course, but there is a true sense of loss from that day, and of all events that take our loved ones away from us forever. Peace is a better way to learn, a better way to look back at the past, and a greater hope that things can indeed be won without bloodshed.
Remember the pain, remember the fear, and remember the sacrifices, and think about how, sometimes, it still feels as though we are in a neverending state of war. Too many people are still oppressed, and live in a state of fear, but it wasn't until 7 years ago that one man committed treason and launched a war where the US was the aggressor. Until that moment, we had kept to the high road, fighting back when we were attacked--now, it is painfully clear that the US is no longer a nation defending itself from other aggressors, but one which has defied global law and gone after another country.
We need to remember who we are as a nation, and decide what we stand for. We have spent the decade of 2001 to 2009 making rich men even richer, and poor men even more destitute. We have spent these years capitulating to the far right, even now, a frustration trend that thrusts us into the belly of the great beast. We are no longer a democracy, when instead it is the oligarchs who claim rule over the people.
We must come together, somehow, and make this a great country again, but how we will manage that, I'm not sure. But until it happens, we will never again be one of the greatest nations on Planet Earth.
Bring us back to glory: defeat the far right in everything they do.
Things have changed since then, of course, but there is a true sense of loss from that day, and of all events that take our loved ones away from us forever. Peace is a better way to learn, a better way to look back at the past, and a greater hope that things can indeed be won without bloodshed.
Remember the pain, remember the fear, and remember the sacrifices, and think about how, sometimes, it still feels as though we are in a neverending state of war. Too many people are still oppressed, and live in a state of fear, but it wasn't until 7 years ago that one man committed treason and launched a war where the US was the aggressor. Until that moment, we had kept to the high road, fighting back when we were attacked--now, it is painfully clear that the US is no longer a nation defending itself from other aggressors, but one which has defied global law and gone after another country.
We need to remember who we are as a nation, and decide what we stand for. We have spent the decade of 2001 to 2009 making rich men even richer, and poor men even more destitute. We have spent these years capitulating to the far right, even now, a frustration trend that thrusts us into the belly of the great beast. We are no longer a democracy, when instead it is the oligarchs who claim rule over the people.
We must come together, somehow, and make this a great country again, but how we will manage that, I'm not sure. But until it happens, we will never again be one of the greatest nations on Planet Earth.
Bring us back to glory: defeat the far right in everything they do.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Grasp Each Day as it Comes....
Tomorrow is the first of December. Wow. Another whole year will soon be gone, and I seem to look at things in terms of years now, without the thought of simple months or days, which is scary enough as it is. People can't always accept each day as it comes, too focused on outcomes and plans for another time, often too far in the future to think about substantially.
We need to get off the roller coaster and spend a little more time with the present, and plan for the future in real ways, not allow our senses to skip over whole days or weeks to get somewhere else. So let's not rush into the holiday season, please! It's only going to be the beginning of the month, and while some people and things are going to be rushing around, don't allow time to simply vanish without an investment on your part.
We are living one big moment to another, and we're going to be disappointed when our ends come. The little moments count just as much as the big ones, and when we're at the moment of our deaths, we will regret more than we relished.
At that time, we're going to believe in the cliches about cherishing each moment as it comes, but like everyone else, it's going to be too late.
Carpe diem! And remember--the little things matter as much as the big ones.
We need to get off the roller coaster and spend a little more time with the present, and plan for the future in real ways, not allow our senses to skip over whole days or weeks to get somewhere else. So let's not rush into the holiday season, please! It's only going to be the beginning of the month, and while some people and things are going to be rushing around, don't allow time to simply vanish without an investment on your part.
We are living one big moment to another, and we're going to be disappointed when our ends come. The little moments count just as much as the big ones, and when we're at the moment of our deaths, we will regret more than we relished.
At that time, we're going to believe in the cliches about cherishing each moment as it comes, but like everyone else, it's going to be too late.
Carpe diem! And remember--the little things matter as much as the big ones.
Monday, November 29, 2010
I Fall Down and Go Boom!
When I go to doctor appointments, I get rides with the local transit company, which will often pick me up in a transit van.
The van is the kind which will often transport wheelchairs or electric scooters, as well as an area for people who can sit in regular chairs. I'm one of the latter people.
So I get on board the van, and sit in the front row. Right behind the van driver is one of those areas where wheelchairs are secured, and the seats are opposite that area. I tried to buckle my seat belt, but it wouldn't latch, so I had to re-insert it into the "well" area, and bring it back out all the way to have it latch. In the meanwhile, the driver started the bus, and asked me if I was all set, and I said yes, expecting the belt to be hitched by then.
Well, it happened really fast--the driver started down the hill a little, and was taking a sharp turn, and the seat belt wouldn't close, so I left the chair, falling off, and somehow or another, banged my head and knee. The driver was mortified, and kept asking me if I was okay, and since I didn't want to make her worry, I said I was fine. At that moment I was fine, I think, but I was getting the teeniest bit of a headache.
My ride was to see a new doctor, and I felt fine enough to go to my appointment. The new doctor was a neurologist, and we were taking about my really rotten sleep patterns. At one point, I was rubbing my neck a little and he asked if I was okay, and I told him I had fallen on the van, and he said "So that's why you have blood on your head."
Jeez! He examined it to look at it, and said I had a laceration of about 3cm, which I later found out is essentially an inch. He said when I was finished there, someone would take me down to the ER for treatment. Well, I ended up having to cancel my ride home, and then spent about 4 hours in the ER, most of the time just sitting. I didn't even have my cell phone with me, or a book. I figured if I fell asleep they would think I was reacting to a concussion, so I tried really hard not to let that happen!
When the docs looked, they agreed with the neurologist, and said I had a laceration, and they would put staples in it. So, when I left the hospital, after my friend Steve picked me up, I felt like Frankenstein with 4 staples in my scalp. Follow-up is within a week to 10 days, to have the staples removed.
And to make it even worse, I didn't have my cane with me! It wouldn't really have mattered, I guess, as I was sitting down, but there is always the thought that it might have helped.
My knee remained normal, with no evidence of trauma. Now, at least I know that while my skull is pretty thick, my skin is a lot thinner!
The van is the kind which will often transport wheelchairs or electric scooters, as well as an area for people who can sit in regular chairs. I'm one of the latter people.
So I get on board the van, and sit in the front row. Right behind the van driver is one of those areas where wheelchairs are secured, and the seats are opposite that area. I tried to buckle my seat belt, but it wouldn't latch, so I had to re-insert it into the "well" area, and bring it back out all the way to have it latch. In the meanwhile, the driver started the bus, and asked me if I was all set, and I said yes, expecting the belt to be hitched by then.
Well, it happened really fast--the driver started down the hill a little, and was taking a sharp turn, and the seat belt wouldn't close, so I left the chair, falling off, and somehow or another, banged my head and knee. The driver was mortified, and kept asking me if I was okay, and since I didn't want to make her worry, I said I was fine. At that moment I was fine, I think, but I was getting the teeniest bit of a headache.
My ride was to see a new doctor, and I felt fine enough to go to my appointment. The new doctor was a neurologist, and we were taking about my really rotten sleep patterns. At one point, I was rubbing my neck a little and he asked if I was okay, and I told him I had fallen on the van, and he said "So that's why you have blood on your head."
Jeez! He examined it to look at it, and said I had a laceration of about 3cm, which I later found out is essentially an inch. He said when I was finished there, someone would take me down to the ER for treatment. Well, I ended up having to cancel my ride home, and then spent about 4 hours in the ER, most of the time just sitting. I didn't even have my cell phone with me, or a book. I figured if I fell asleep they would think I was reacting to a concussion, so I tried really hard not to let that happen!
When the docs looked, they agreed with the neurologist, and said I had a laceration, and they would put staples in it. So, when I left the hospital, after my friend Steve picked me up, I felt like Frankenstein with 4 staples in my scalp. Follow-up is within a week to 10 days, to have the staples removed.
And to make it even worse, I didn't have my cane with me! It wouldn't really have mattered, I guess, as I was sitting down, but there is always the thought that it might have helped.
My knee remained normal, with no evidence of trauma. Now, at least I know that while my skull is pretty thick, my skin is a lot thinner!
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